Hey, ho. Liam here. Liam Goodwell. Third son o’ the first son o’ Langston Goodwell, long o’ Denton County, northern Missouri, these United States of America!
Now, here’s the deal. Linc and Lawrence, they bein’ the oldest o’ our youngin’ pack, they get their fair share o’ adventures an’ such. Me bein’ third, why, I have to fight fer near ever’thing and here I go ag’in.
‘Ppears Grandpap, Daddy, Lincoln and Lawrence, they been chattin’ and a’plannin’, an’ they got them a plan to go frog giggin’ this weekend upcomin’.
They ain’t been a’hidin’ it, no sir. Been talkin’ plum as loud an’ as often as they see fit. What they ain’t been seemin’ eager to do is bring along yours truly. Say ag’in? You heard me right, they ain’t said once, “Hey, Liam, get yer tack together, we’re goin’ giggin’ this here weekend upcomin’!” Nor ain’t one, an’ them bein’ my own flesh an’ blood an’ kin, siddled up, popped me on the shoulder, “C’mon Liam, we’re lookin’ to gig us from bull frogs come Friday night into mornin’. You comin’?”
Them ornery cusses I call my brothers, that’d be Lincoln and Lawrence, they just been goin’ ’bout their business, preenin’ and yawin’ and chore’in’ and what all, all the while knowin’ I’m itchin’ and wrigglin’ to go ‘long!
It ain’t like I ain’t never been. Been giggin’ near my whole last half o’ my thirteen years.
It ain’t like I ain’t skilled. I got me reflexes them frogs don’t see comin’.
I ain’t like I ain’t never gone on my own and brung back a mess o’ bullies all my ownself.
An’ it ain’t like I’m a’gonna ask them, all undignified and desperate like some key-holed nambypamby mollycoddled milsop (You think I was leanin’ in on “Mama’s boy?” You met my mama? That don’t fly in OUR house! We do her biddin’ ’cause she’s as tough as a leather strop an’ a keg o’ penny nails….and can sure bake us up some apple pies brings tears to our eyes!)!
So, uncharacteristic o’ any o’ us Goodwells, I’m a’waitin’. Jest a’waitin’. Waitin’ fer them fellers to ask me along. Waitin’ to come up with me a plan.
So far on both them counts? I’m a’comin’ up empty….